Editor’s Note: E. Victoria Lee is a published author and spiritual teacher. In 2000, she wrote “Secrets in the Soul,” which is now available on Amazon.com. A fellow traveler, we are honored to have her guest blog on soberhelpnow.net.
Session #10 – Developing a Higher Belief System About ME (My Energy)
From Workbook on Healing the Inner Child/Self (Updated, © 2009)
Written by E. Victoria Lee, D.D., Author, Los Angeles (sobriety date 10/21/1981)
New to sobriety or continuous years in like me (31), I wish each of you a happy new beginning in sobriety one day at a time. Another Year IS had by all to make IT better than ever through listening to YOUR Higher Power and following your plans in TIME to completion. So with that in mind, let us begin by establishing a gate between the child’s emotions and the adult’s mind.(Did you see the underscored question?)
ASSIGNMENT: “Growing Up All Over Again” – Acquiring and Using Steps for Moving Toward Mature Adulthood:
1. RECOGNIZE emotional conflict within oneself. Write on any and all conflicts that arise as frequently as possible when these arise. It will help you to see what really is and what is in your imaginings.
2. DISMISS denial about what really happened in the past as you become aware of them. Don’t play it down so far that it becomes buried in the recesses of your being. Write about the discoveries you’re finding out about the part the past is playing in your present and if not cleared will continue to haunt you in your future. Stay alert to the past seeking to take over your life.
3. BEGIN resolving negative feelings by tuning into ones spiritual self (often coming from the inner child’s voice) through 12-step meetings and working with a sponsor, workshops, retreats; gather supportive friendships promoting self-worth; if you really need indepth help, utilize a life coach and/or psychotherapy because your sponsor won’t always know the answers. Remember a sponsor is in a 12-step program for their ownself; join a weekly support group for childhood woes uncovering, discovery and pointed recovery in this area; even turn to a minister (preferably with life coaching training) if you are having spiritual conflicts beyond what 12 steps can help with right now. Choose from this list, make and keep your appointments with whomever you choose to enlist in helping you.
4. STOP lying to oneself about “It really wasn’t that awful”. Accept that you had a rough childhood even young adulthood; prepare to seek out and change ones outlook as you grow into mature adulthood, hence removing negatives in action, feelings and relationships.
5. STOP allowing people “in” who continue to repeat the abuse patterns inflicted in childhood (abusive behaviors such as overheard arguing many times, being belittled, aware of parental drinking, cheating, burying feelings that break out in negative ways, observing deceptiveness and manipulation, etc.)
FORMULA FOR EMOTION: E-energy + M-motion/action = ME holding multiple emotions, positive and negative.
WRITE ON: The empowerment your Higher Power affords you to move out of the past and into a fresh brighter and bolder future. Maybe that’s all you’ll need for a new year of resolves.
NEXT SESSION: Prepare to write about your childhood as a “Looking Back” Report which will work to keep you out of the dark past and moving further into the light of spirituality.
